Poetry Friday: “All You Who Sleep Tonight”

After seventeen years of marriage, sleeping alone in our bed evokes a deep, intimate loneliness. I miss Rob every time I turn off the light and slip beneath my blankets. Since he died, many nights I just can’t do it. I grab a sleeping bag and pillow and camp out for the night on theContinue reading “Poetry Friday: “All You Who Sleep Tonight””

The One Who Lost Her Husband

“Oh, you’re the one who lost her husband,” she says as I introduce myself and shake her hand. “Yes, that’s me,” I reply. I wonder now if she caught my name, or if this single event in my life will be my defining feature, the one thing she remembers each time she sees my face.Continue reading “The One Who Lost Her Husband”

The Nicest Gift You Could Give

The year after our first daughter was born, Rob gave me a Kitchen-Aid standing mixer for Mother’s Day. In secret, he headed down to our local Williams-Sonoma store and picked it out. We’d only been married for three years. He didn’t yet realize how much I hate to cook.  In those years, we were prettyContinue reading “The Nicest Gift You Could Give”

Nothing To Say

As we drove through the national park, my husband Rob glanced away from the road toward the shores of Yellowstone Lake. A retired couple sat in two camping chairs a few feet from the water’s edge. No books rested in their laps, no fishing rods in their hands. They simply sat, enjoying the silence, surroundedContinue reading “Nothing To Say”

“A channel in my self-bound soul”

Today, on Maundy Thursday, the church remembers the last supper Jesus shared with his disciples before his death, the meal at which he washed his friends’ feet. Maundy Thursday is one of the final stops on our journey through Holy Week. There’s a feeling of inevitability that hangs over this day. Everybody knows this momentContinue reading ““A channel in my self-bound soul””

What’s in a Name?

Recently, I gave a presentation at my children’s school. Many students know that my two children who attend there lost their father last summer. They are aware that our family doesn’t look like theirs. It is always a relief to enter a group of people with whom I don’t need to explain the complexities ofContinue reading “What’s in a Name?”