“He had felt safe and strong in his shell. But now it was too snug. Hermit Crab stepped out of the shell and onto the floor of the ocean. But it was frightening out in the open sea without a shell to hide in.” Eric Carle, A House for Hermit Crab This past weekend IContinue reading “Finding a New Shell”
Monthly Archives: June 2020
The Bittersweetness of Adventure
Even though Rob only lived in our house for one year before he died, his fingerprints are all over it. We bought the house with the intention to work on it, and we started right away when we moved in. Two years later, I walk through the rooms and remember the walls we painted togetherContinue reading “The Bittersweetness of Adventure”
On Toward the Horizon
A year ago today our family began our road trip west, the vacation that would end in death. Rob took these pictures on the shores of Lake Erie that night, after our first day of driving. We had looked forward to this trip for months, and that first night was so filled with happiness. WeContinue reading “On Toward the Horizon”
Eleven Months: How Far We’ve Come
Temperatures have reached the upper 80s here in New England, and we’re enjoying lazy summer evenings now that school has ended. Because of ongoing COVID limitations, we have nowhere we need to go, nothing we need to do. So after the evening meal is finished and dishes are cleared, the five of us sit aroundContinue reading “Eleven Months: How Far We’ve Come”
The Dead Elephant In the Room
“Praising what is lost / Makes the remembrance dear.” William Shakespeare, All’s Well That Ends Well When I was a college speech teacher years ago, I used to tell my students that the top two fears people had were death and public speaking. I was afraid of the former but through years of practice hadContinue reading “The Dead Elephant In the Room”
Listening For His Voice
When I leave my children home alone, we keep Rob’s phone on the kitchen island in case they need to call me while I’m out. My kids know the phone is only for emergencies, but I try to check up on them regularly when I’m gone. Leaving your kids after loss is a complex process,Continue reading “Listening For His Voice”
Poetry Friday: “From Blossoms”
One of my favorite Rob-isms was “It’s all about death and resurrection.” He’d often quote John 12:24 when he said it. Here in New England, we’re on the cusp of summer. The world is in full bloom. All of those seeds that fell to the ground last fall are coming up as flowers in gorgeousContinue reading “Poetry Friday: “From Blossoms””
Hot, Angry Tears
On our 2017 road trip, Rob and I took our children to the Brown vs. Board of Education National Historic Site in Topeka, Kansas. Grass on the front lawn had already browned to a crisp that July day, and the Monroe Elementary School building offered a welcome respite from the hot sun outside. Our familyContinue reading “Hot, Angry Tears”
The Ten Year Plan House
All of my life, I’ve been a long-range planner. I’ve loved thinking about broad swaths of time. My childhood journals charted out which boy I’d marry, the names of my children, even floor plan drawings of my dream house. When I met Rob, he and I jumped excitedly into planning together. Time seemed infinite, andContinue reading “The Ten Year Plan House”
Putting The Pieces Back Together
A shattering sound breaks the early morning quiet and sends me shuffling from the sofa into the kitchen. He stands frozen, penitence in his eyes. “I’m sorry, Mom,” he says as he gently gathers the pieces of the broken mug from across the counter. “I accidentally hit it with my elbow when I turned around.” Continue reading “Putting The Pieces Back Together”