What do you do with a lifetime’s worth of possessions when the person who owned them is gone? It is normal within grief to keep everything, to give everything away, and anything in between. Physical reminders of a loved one can bring back happy memories; they can also provoke pain. In the end, things are just things. They aren’t the person you lost. Keeping possessions won’t keep someone with you; giving items away won’t make their memory fade. This physical process of lament is as unique as the mourner who endures it. Curious how I’ve approached this hard part of grieving? Click here and here and here to read more.
Lament
Edna St. Vincent Millay
Listen, children:
Your father is dead.
From his old coats
I’ll make you little jackets;
I’ll make you little trousers
From his old pants.
There’ll be in his pockets
Things he used to put there,
Keys and pennies
Covered with tobacco;
Dan shall have the pennies
To save in his bank;
Anne shall have the keys
To make a pretty noise with.
Life must go on,
And the dead be forgotten;
Life must go on,
Though good men die;
Anne, eat your breakfast;
Dan, take your medicine;
Life must go on;
I forget just why.